In my English class, my friend had this big drink on his desk. We also had a test that day. I tried to get Tyler to piss everybody off (because it's hilarious when he does it), so I stole his drink, and blamed somebody else.

So, obviously, the teacher starts getting irritated, and I expected him to yell at Tyler. Instead, some annoying, 'over-mature', whore stood up, and yelled, 'GROW UP! JUST GROW UP!!! YOU'RE SO IMMATURE.'

I was trying to think of a way to creatively threaten to cut her throat with a meat cleaver, but I couldn't think of any.

I fucking hate people like that though, they're just afraid to have fun.

The other day, in my French class, we were playing a game where you had to touch a body part (that was drawn on the board) with a fly swatter.

If the teacher said "Elle tete" (Her head) we would touch the girl's head, and we were trying to touch it faster than the other team.

There was an unfair advantage to the side that was closer to the right body part, so I raised my hand and said, "Why doesn't our team touch the girl [it was closer to us] and your team touch the boy?"

*awkward silence*

I continue, "and if any of you add to that sentence..."

I love pointing out people's natural sexual perversion of non-sexual situations.