This contains quotes from my actual 'friends.' I hate all of my 'friends' so much.

Brace Yourself Assholes

I Am So GODDAMN Tired of being reminded of being less hygienic. I don't wash my hair. BIG FUCKING DEAL! If it really goddamn annoys you, go blow you GODDAMN brains out. I have not gone one day this month without my lack of cleanliness being mentioned. Maybe I think it's more comfortable when my hair is greasy. Maybe my high school career isn't solely about self consciousness. Just because you're socially awkward, doesn't give you any right in hell to mock my goddamn hair. Everybody that is viewing this has done it. Whether it was a 'Gentle Reminder' of my hygiene habits, or a full blown "WHY DON'T YOU WASH YOUR HAIR?" or "THAT'S GROSS." It's so GODDAMN irritating. I guarantee that if Greasy Hair was popular, or it was a the new trend, then all of you wouldn't wash your hair. If any of you fucking deny any of this, I want you to goddamn back it up with evidence and a plausible excuse.

I Am So GODDAMN Tired of your GODDAMN cell phones. This is mostly addressed to anybody that texts more than 10 text messages a day. My theory why people text: Socially awkward, self conscious teenagers wanting to look occupied, to prevent being thought of as 'nerdy' or 'weird.' Because we wouldn't want that would we? You don't want to look weird in front of you friends do you? So maybe if we all text, I'll be thought highly of. Won't that make you so GODDAMN rebellious and individual. Every time I get a text message, It's about something pointless. The only good reason why people should text, or even use phones in general, should be to COMMUNICATE with one another. Communicate in terms of: an actual conversation. Texting should be communication, but if you're in a crowded, loud place, and need to send a quick message, where if you called the person, it would be inaudible. Unlike my suggestion, you IGNORANT FUCKS decide to send pointless messages, with impossible to decipher words, and idiotic chain messages, or whoreish pictures of yourself to your goddamn douche bag boyfriend.

I Am So GODDAMN Tired of your idiotic agreements with me. You don't even know what the hell I'm talking about half the time! My simple vocabulary is far too advanced for you! Do I need a GODDAMN translation? Am I that GODDAMN Cryptic? When I mock corporations, you probably nod your head, and add in an occasional "Yea, I know, they suck" or something like that. You don't even know any alternatives to Corporate ignorance do you? GODDAMMIT it fucking annoys me.

I Am So GODDAMN Tired of you self conscious, cliquey, conformist TREND WHORES!!! You don't even know how much it FUCKING irritates me when you clean yourself up for half an hour for a day of sitting in school for 6 hours. Nobody cares what you look like. Anybody that does is a Jackass. But you want to be friends with everybody don't you? You don't want to be a 'Loner' do you? 'Cuz then you might look Nerdy, and we wouldn't FUCKING want that!!! You goddamn pretend you enjoy whatever is GODDAMN popular! Twilight, for example, is the biggest joke I've ever attempted to read. Yes, I read some of Twilight. It sucks. You ASSHOLES pretended to hate reading before Twilight. Now don't throw around that BULLSHIT that it's a good book, and that's why it's popular, because that's HORSESHIT. YOU ARE HORSESHIT. Twilight is a the worst thing the corporations have excreted in the last 10 years, and trust me, in the last 10 years, a lot of SHIT has been produced. But it seems that you don't have opinions! You do what's popular. You listen to what's popular. You dress in what's popular. And don't give me and crap about how Hollister (or any other generic preppy store) is comfier. I know you wear it because it's what others are wearing. You can get the same GODDAMN clothes at half (or less) of the price. It's indescribable how much FUCKING PISSED OFF I get when I simply think of you wearing that shit. Stop caring what people think of you!!! SERIOUSLY!!! DO WHAT YOU GODDAMN WANT TO DO!!!

I Am So GODDAMN Tired of your noise. This *Noise* can hardly be called music, because music requires the following: Real...Instruments. These producers could at least use samples! But that sounds too 'Real' doesn't it? Even 'Rock' (I hesitate to call this shit rock, because it's actually corporate pop, but it uses real samples, and they actually sing) sucks today. But it's better than your pop. If I hear "Oh, (S)he's such a good singer!" I'll FUCKING PUKE. They don't sing!!! They use synthesizers to move there voice up and down. You can GODDAMN HEAR IT!!! Take it from somebody who produces his own music! (Just a few demo tracks, and it can hardly be considered producing)

I swear to god, if any of you agree with me, I'll shoot myself in the fucking head.

Some people were not mentioned in this, but you know who you are if you were.
If you were, You need to...